Category Archives: advertising

Psychographic profile: I am teh ghost of a dead blog

I am the ghost of a dead blog
booooo
did i scare u?
hope so. y’all woke me up from ‘the dreamless sleep’.
am pissed y’all. what do y’all think i died 4???
just want 2 die.
tired of bein ‘zany ‘n smart’.
is fun, but like, ‘u can’t be cool 4eva’ +
‘cool doesn’t pay da billz’ +
‘enjoy urself, take only what you need from it’
etc.
was kinda enjoying being dead.
is real peaceful.
no 1 to get all up in my facebook
no 3G here in hell


don’t hav 2 maintain ur personal brand (via being on fire all the time)
plus satan kinda keeeeeeeewl.
but now i went andgot all resurrected
by a reputable publication with a ‘niche-but-influential and educated readership’
(kinda wish it was heat magazine but whatevs)

i am the ghost of a dead blog.
boooOOOOOoooooo
gonna rattle my alexander mcqueen chain bags at u
keeping u up in the dark night of ur blog
feeling kinda vengeful
since when i was still alive
ppl were like, u r stupid
now i’m dead, ppl are like, u  were so like, clevs
“the blog artist’s value is only recognised posthumounguously”
isn’t it typical

“it’s like that, and that’s the way it is” – run dmc

don’t worry – not very vengeful. just l’il bit.
just gonna make ur light bulbs flicker some.
not gonna go polty on you. boooOOOOoo.

i am the ghost of a dead blog.
woke up coz i rolled in my grave
kinda just feel like we need to talk about ‘letting go’


did y’all get pissed at MJ when Thriller the song ends?
Do y’all get pissed when the movie u hired is finished?
stupid f-ing movie! u came to an end!

This is a meme joke. Do u get it?

did y’all get pissed at JK Rowling when she finished Harry Potter?
(ok so bad example. f-u JK. you got me hooked.)
NEwayz just trying to help you let go

This is a pooooOOOooetry joke. Do u get it?

boooOOOOOoooooooo

I am the ghost of a dead blog
was ‘summoned by the oujja board of journalistic truthful objective unbiased integritay’
never imagined dis blowgn thang would ‘get all intellectualised’
just wanted to be awesome y’ulz.
never dreamed my personal brand would have such ‘residual value attached to its key branding paradigm pillars of differentiation’.
kinda emotional about it.
(via wishing i was still dead)
there is only one feeling in hell (being burned)
sad, was just betterin my table tennis scores
was just getting 2 know satan (miss u bro. next time i see you PING PONG IS ON LIKE KING KONG!)

I am the ghost of a dead blog.
Gonna go ‘back 2 bed now’.
it was ‘nice chatting’.
off you go now to the new blog.
know that i am always with you.
am there in the new blog
though u cannot always see me.
if u look carefully, i am there.


am just ‘talking in a different accent’.
am just ‘trying on some new blogshoes’.
just ‘exploring a new personal sub-brand’.
da holding company stays da same. 4evs y’all. pinkie swear.

miss y’ulz.
love y’ulz.
h8 y’ulz.
ditto.


Twitter Imposter

Just so y’all know, my old Twitter account (MyBrandedLifeTM) has been hijacked! So if you see someone tweeting at MBLTM, it’s not me. I am now @CapeTown_Girl. And that’s that.


y’all, this is it.

This is it y’all.


Y’all is time 4 me to ‘hit the proverbial demerol’ via some shady docbro and ‘accidentally commit suicide’ via intentionally ‘leaving this world’ and ‘quitting the game while i am ahead’ so my ‘legend can live on’ and i don’t get ‘old and ugly’, like MJ. Miss you MJ. Some people have emailed me 2 say ‘WTF is happening with ur blog’ and ‘U R not srs R u?’ and ‘do u rly rly read Marian Keyes? F U penguin’.  Y’ulz, don’t stress. This is not ‘goodbye 4 eva’. Just facing up 2 the fact that ‘i have changed’ and ‘things have changed’ and as a ‘cre8ive person’ i am ‘too zany 2 do something too specific 4 too long’ (via ADD).

Have ‘taken my learnings into account’ and have ‘cre8ed a new vision’, one with ‘space 2 let me grow’ and ‘realise my potential’. NEwayz. Gonna miss some things so much, like making interns cry. And being in love with ideas. And reminiscing bout bein an ad student. Y’ulz just gotta know that these things will ‘live on’ via this blog and via my new blog identity. I think. Kinda  ‘not rly sure’. But app ‘life is a rollercoaster jus gotta ride it’.

See y’ulz monday, ‘all shiney & new’. So long & thanks 4 all the RT’s.

MBLTM


MyBrandedRetrospective part 2

Ah Y’ulz. All teary-eyed this morning. Was remembering that one time, at Brand Camp. Miss y’ulz. Kinda reminds me of when Jupies sold out to WPP which made me first considerselling my personal brand’. And now I have actually gone and sold my PB – 2 think that it was ‘once just a dream’. Just not gonna tell y’ulz who ‘who the new shareholders of MBLTM trading as something else’ are 4 fear of being ‘ripped off by a sarky brat ad blogger’. Wonder if I will maintain my ‘quality of humour’, or if ‘going commercial’ will ‘water me down’ to something ‘lots of ppl like’, like a Citi Golf. Which reminds me of when i wanted 2sue my parents 4 not buying me a citi golf’. Well what do they expect. Poeses. Gonna complain about it on my GBuzz (the zazzy new program that is like ‘what Googlewave was s’posed 2 be’). Remember Googlewave? And how you ‘needed an invite 2 use it’ when rly ‘you needed a degree in GoogleHype 2 use it’. Ah y’ulz. Y’alls faces gettin’ wet yet? So wet y’ulz. Wet 4 you.


MyBrandedRetrospective part 1

Y’ulz getting all nostalgic about all the good times we’ve had here together. Now that MBLTM is ‘coming to a close’ via ‘transforming into a new blog’, I feel it’s only appropriate to run y’all through some of the good times, and some of the bad times. Like that time when I wrote about ATL vs BTL and some ATL people I work with ‘told on me to our boss’ because they ‘are whiney l’il b*tches felt offended’ and i got ‘called in for being naughty’ and was prompted to ‘consider taking our personality insurance’ - true story. Good times!

And that time those 9-year-olds ganged up on me and ‘called my radio ads stupid’. Bad times but also good times, really. And that time I made a break-through in ‘learning 2 speak Client Service’ which was invaluable 2 my career. Ah y’all, I’m gonna miss y’alls. Srsly. Gonna miss y’alls crazy letters, like the one letter where I was enlightened that ‘I don’t have 2 go all the way I can just kiss’. Y’alls should stick around this week for more retrospective introspection as we ‘get our emo on’ recall the whirlwind of a rollercoaster adventure ride that has been our time together here on MyBrandedLifeTM.


What a ride y’alls. Can’t wait for the next chapter, but more about that ‘l8er in the week’.

Am i a freaking MILLENIAL?

Y’ulz, am worried. have worked soooooo hard to ‘not fit in a box’ or be ‘easily segmented’ but according 2 this l’il jazzy slideshow there ‘are loads of me out there’, ‘not fitting in2 boxes’. Have also been ‘made aware’ of some ‘nifty trix’ i have yet 2 emply, 4 eg. ‘having a show at my house’ instead of ‘seeing a band’, and ‘making my own fun’. Are y’alls aware of this? Have y’alls been aware of this ‘the whole time’? Why did no1 tell me? Is ‘the joke on me’?

Want 2 die. Fuck my life.

(thanks 4 enlightening me, sethbro.)

Tried my best. Over 2 y’ulz.


Y’ulz, all my life
Tried so hard ‘2 be spesh’
So scared of goin’ through this life
With a ‘fake moleskine from clicks’
Decided to ‘take this shot at my future’
And try out
4 da ‘National Cre8ive Team’ (via Design Indaba Supastars)



Y’ulz, all my life
Tried so hard ‘2 be different’
Stuck lots of ‘zany images from fffffound’ on my walls
Wrote lots of ‘zany cre8ive ideas’ on my hands (2 look busy while ‘on the internet’)
Updated my fbook with ‘ambiguous truths that might be about u’
Sang along 2 MGMT / Peter Bjorn & Jbro (even tweeted some lyrics)



Y’ulz
Tried so hard 2 ‘do my cre8ive bros proud’
Smoked cigarettes ‘til my gums bleed tar’
Drank alcohol ‘til I pissed premium beer’
Did lines ‘til my antidepressants didn’t work’
Even ‘talked bout digital being da future’ late in2 the nite with my Cre8ive Director y’ulz



Y’ulz
Tried so hard 2 ‘differentiate my Personal Brand’
Even ‘wrote all over my shoes’ (via customisation)
Zaned 2 the max and ‘Wore Converse with a dress’
Even ‘slept with all my guy friends’ once (via being a slag)
So I could be ‘truly cre8ive’



Is over to y’ulz now
Can do no more (‘cept encourage y’all 2 ‘clear ur cache’ so y’alls can ‘rig my vote’)
S’all up 2 you now
My crea8ive bros
Click on this link 2 ‘show me some 5 star luvin’
Maybe my dream will ‘cum true’
And I can stop ‘chasing the Loerie’
Maybe y’ulz
Maybe. Tried my best.

*******************************************************

If y’ulz would like 2 see me representin’ on the ‘National Cre8ive Team’, please click here and rate my entry (below) with 5 Stars. Then clear your cache & do it again. Ta bros.

Y’ulz can rest assured that if i make it onto the ‘National Cre8ive Team’ I will make sure biscuits are compulsory in ALL cre8ive briefings & will insist that all Client Service ppl ‘wear a bell around their necks’ so we ‘know they are coming’.