Category Archives: innovation

My latest business venture

Y’ulz, I am an entrepreneur. Did y’ulz know that? Sometimes I can’t ‘touch you’ via blogging because I am ‘running this town tonight’.

N E wayz…


I hav a dream. And that dream is to cre8 my vry own facebook appy. It will be called FUCKVILLE, and its appeal is quite logical y’all. Basically, various small, lonely animals will wonder in and out of your fbook profile, and you will be offered the chance 2 ‘fuck them’.

A screenshot of how the average user will interface with Fuckville.

What do y’als think? Am basically pitching it to my VC bros as ‘the ultimate facebook app, a rollercoaster ride of sex, sheep and fuckery’. Think it’ll be a hit y’ulle? Am going to do a spot market research poll (for my FLYSWAT analysis later, pls leave your answer as a comment):

Will FUCKVILLE be a hit appy?

a) You’re a fucking genius Alex. Fucking fuck.

b) Of course it will. You can make an app out of anything and the laggards on the facebook adoption cycle will lap it up because they’re lower middle-class worker ants who drive third-hand hatchbacks and aspire to being head supervisor at the forklift company and playing Fuckville will allow them to ‘take back their time’ (via looking like they’re working)

c) No ways. Fucking sheep is sooooo 2000-and-late

d) If you release this app into the armies of spammy app-lapping tards on facebook I will kill myself and leave this blog post open on my laptop so ppl know why I did it.

e) There is already an app like this, except they call ‘fucking’ “farming”. Perhaps the similarity is intentional?


Appreciate your help on my individual journey to entrepreneurial greatness. If you would like the once-in-a-lifetime chance 2 be a part of this ‘sure thing’ y’als can drop me a comment telling me the top 5 ‘animals people like 2 fuck’ & I will get back 2 you based on the acumen displayed in your insights. Thanks 4 helping me ‘work night and day’ 2 make the internet ‘a more fun place’ for y’ulz.

sponsoratized post: MiMoney helps me experience ‘being just rich’

So MiMoney sent me a R500 voucher to spend on something nice so that I could get a feel for how it works y’ulz. Tested it out on the 2 things I mostly order on the interwebs, sex and prescription drugs. Kidding. Ordered 2 books from Kalahari.net that i’ve been wanting for ages: Rainer Maria Rilke’s ‘Letters to a young poet’ (recommend reading it if y’ulz are ‘cre8ive’ and ppl give you shit for it) and Jung’s ‘Memories, Dreams, Reflections’ (is Jung’s autobiography, recommend reading it if y’ulz ‘know too much about the world’ & ppl give you shit for it). They arrived this morning. Happy times y’all!

Oooh, a package. What could it be?

Oooh, a package. What could it be?

Just what Ive always wanted!

Just what I've always wanted!

Happy times.

Happy times.

Also, after having a day when I thought it might be ‘better to be just rich’ than to ‘be creative’ i went home and gorged on sushi from Mr Delivery that MiMoney also paid for (thereby giving me the opportunity to know what ‘being just rich’ feels like). My verdict is that ‘being just rich’ ‘totally rocks’, and that ‘being creative’ needs to work harder at ‘bringing its A-game’ to the task of ‘making my life awesome’.

How MiMoney works:

1. You register with www.mimoney.co.za

2. You purchase MiMoney vouchers which then get sent to your phone.

3. You then use your vouchers as cash, quoting the code sent to your phone when you need to pay for a movie, online order, dinner, or whatever else you want to pay for. Right now it’s a little limiting as to what you can buy, but in future you’ll be able to use your MiMoney everywhere, thereby eliminating the need for cumbersome 19th century trappings such as ‘wallets’ and ‘money’.

Read what kalahari has to say about MiMoney here (putting this link in because app the mimoney site is giving some trouble).

Should I make a giant inflatable blog?

As y’all know, I’m rebranding. Today I’m asking myself whether I should be exploiting some sort of gimmick to ‘attract readers driving past’. I got this idea when somebody tweeted about a ‘brilliant piece of MacDonald’s advertising’, which was just a streetpole that had been dressed to look like a giant McD’s coffee pot pouring coffee into a giant McD’s coffee cup. Should I get a giant inflatable version of my blog and tie it to the roof of Wembley Square?

Click here for fun.

Click here for fun.

Maybe an over-sized vagina? (just to prove to y’all I’m not a man)

notahermie.blogspot.com

notahermie.blogspot.com

Employing this kind of gimmick ‘flies in the face of convention you fools!’. It says that even though I have been educated about what is and isn’t good advertising, I’m still going to go with the gimmick because ‘it attracts attention’ and will ‘drive footfall through my blog store’ and ‘has talkability’ and ‘will generate an instant reaction’. Guess I will just have to binge on fast food to ‘make myself forget’ that I have sacrificed the integrity of my blog brand for a moment’s attention. No matter – y’all are reading this, right?

Load of crap. Really big one.

Load of crap. Really big one.

I guess the twitter equivalent of getting a giant inflatable blog and tying it to Wembley Square would be tweeting something like ‘Look at my newly waxed vagina’ and then posting a link to this post. Might just do that to ‘prove my point’, even though my readers will be annoyed at being misled for such an averagely interesting post on ‘ethics and integrity in advertising’ on my journey towards a total rebrand. Sorry y’all. Just wanted 2 be loved. Just wanted you to ‘boost my pageviews’ which is the blog equivalent to ‘driving volume’ in the  FMCG world that is online consumer-created content (ie. blogs).  Feeling a bit confused. Maybe I need to ‘hire a consultant’ to guide me in this rebranding process and bleed me dry while telling me stuff I already know. Is there anyone y’all can recommend?


Should I take out Personality Insurance?

Hey yulle. Been a little concerned lately that I am ‘slightly offensive’ to some ppl. My mom tells me I am funny and that ‘I shouldn’t change my blog for anyone’ but I’m not sold. Am pretty sure there’s a point at which I will offend the fans who LOL at my Psychographic Profiles at some time or other, and then it will just be me, writing and eating chicken wraps, thinking of ‘the good old days when ppl liked me & gave me iPhones and clicked on my links’.

Been looking at some case studies to establish best practice in Personality Insurance strategies. Found this to be pretty true:

Based on Alex’s Celebrity Study 2009 © one can pretty much conclude that ‘parading around telling people you believe in Jesus’ will allow you to get away with being a total sluttard (totally coined a new word).

One of my heroes. And the hero of most ambitious young women out there.

Miss Montag. One of my heroes. And the hero of most ambitious young women out there.

Same study also says that ‘lording around as if you own the place, when you do own the place (and own other places)’ will allow you to get away with being a sluttard.

My runner up hero. I respect her because she came from nothing and earned everything she has herself.

My runner up hero. I respect her because she came from nothing and earned everything she has herself.

Since I don’t really own anything and am more into ‘being given stuff’ I may have to go the Jesus route. What do y’uls think? Does Jesus suit my hair colour? Is it a rad scene? Does my personal brand allow for something like a ‘religious sub-brand’? Will I be cannibalizing my own brand by taking out personality insurance? What does my brand bible say about this?


Hmm. Does anyone know if Jesus is real? Maybe they can test it on Mythbusters or something. That would be a rad episode. To conclude, I drew a graph.

Some insights for your next strategic meeting.

Some insights for your next strategic meeting.

Until Mythbusters proves Jesus is real I’m just gonna sit tight on my Personality Insurance application. Have any of y’ulle got a better deal than being Christian or rich? Should I call the hippo on TV and let it ‘find me the best quote’ for Personality Insurance? Wish it wasn’t so complicated. Feels like the Personality Insurance industry is pretty stuck in the dark ages. Someone tell them to ‘get on twitter’.

oh the irony

so same friend Lauren (whom I mentioned for Moxyland a few days ago) has also been involved in a political satire show called ZNews, which the SABC commissioned, then canned, and then when Special Assignment did an investigative show on the canning it was then banned (just like Apartheid, eh?). the reason? the show takes the piss out of our politicians, and sadly, gov can’t take it like they dish it.

Heaven Forbid!

Heaven Forbid!

ironically, the show has now been selected for screening at INPUT 2009 – the world’s biggest public broadcaster conference. why? this was their reason:

“Even though is not an innovative format – it is a news parody with puppets – the question of “what are the limits of freedom of speech“ can be heard in this programme. Could this be a relevant question both in Africa and beyond.”

LOLcakes all round. watch the full pilot here.

Design indaba. It was cool.

Loved Design Indaba, even though our traffic managers are in their ‘experimenting with heroine’ phase and scheduled us on Massive Intense Campaign throughout the duration of it. It meant we had to screech across the city and work late a lot. But whatever.

Tried to provide ‘live twitter coverage’ but it didn’t really work because my battery died (iPhone tut tut) plus I’m just not altruistic enough to follow through with that sort of thing.

Speakers I loved were Adams Morioka because they like making design that makes people happy and they don’t take themselves too seriously. Also liked all the uber nano-genetic-bio-tech that Dunne and Raby presented. Didn’t they just make you realize that design is on this whole other level in the EU? Last time I checked the only ‘tech’ you get in design school in this country is CapeTech.

Sigh. Wish I could’ve grown myself a new pair of barcode-reading, cancer-sniffing breasts / arms / ears at college.

Pleasant surprise was Keith Rose. Wish he was my dad so he could give me advice on my digi home movies. Had to watch him carefully as he is also in Creative Circle of Fame and I only have 5 months before I turn 26 which is when I need to be inducted into CCHF. Everyone clapped and got all teary when they showed the elephant IBM ad (back then it was ISM?) and the Dunlop staffie. I personally sobbed into my La Senza bra (it was stuffed in my bag because is too uncomfortable to wear).

Brace yourself.

Brace yourself.


Then the BMW mouse-on-the-steering-wheel ad came on and nobody knew quite what to do so they gave it a standing ovation. Warcrime. Really. Over it.


Also liked Li Edelkoort. I felt like one of her minions when she said Grey-everything, and then played a video about people wearing grey from head-to-toe, as I was wearing grey from head-to-toe. Guess it’s a good thing. Guess I’ve still got my ‘early adopter edge’.

3 ya Li. Wanted to run up and touch her to get some of her special dust.

<3 ya Li. Wanted to run up and touch her to get some of her 'special dust'.

Marian Bantjes also very cool. Like her doodle vibe.

Spent half of Friday frothing at the mouth in anticipation of Javier Mariscal. “Oh you HAVE to see him,” they said. “His last talk was so amazing it made me cry,” they said. He made us wait 45 mins while he constructed a rocket launcher on stage, and proceeded to babble like a madman with a bad case of crack-throat when he finally got up to speak. Was mortified. Kept making eyes at Mallix as if to say “Do you know what’s going on / do you have any valium?” Mallix fed me sweets to shut me up and then I passed out due to sugar low and woke up when the screen was flashing all funny colours. Camera kept switching back to 2 weird little characters who spoke with crack throat. He then finished his talk with some cracked out Freddie Mercury performance, and started shrieking the names of all the other speakers on stage, for no particular reason. Just for fun. The best part of his talk was when he pinned the Anglo Platinum Pin presented to him to his crotch. F-ing designers.

Raving lunatic. I missed the Oprah birthday special for this man.

Raving lunatic. I missed the Oprah birthday special for this man.

But, the star of Design Indaba was undeniably Nobumichi Tosa, a Japanese engineer / designer who makes ‘nonsense machines’, such as a machine that pops ‘all the bubble wrap in a sheet of bubble wrap at once’. For reals. Check out his site, his work truly was mindblowing. He’s also invented a singing robot (creepy in a rad way) and a whole bunch of weird musical instruments, all based on a simple knocker. I also loved his fish power cable, and his funny mask thing, and his wing-knockers, which he wore on stage. Mind.Blowing.

Mad, but in a good, interesting way. Take notes, Mariscal.

Mad, but in a good, interesting way. Take notes, Mariscal.

beating down the pop-ups

love this article on PSFK about how much of a non-event pop-up stores are. i’ve always thought pop-up stores were a pretty lame idea to begin with. unless you’re reinventing the whole shopping experience (which very few pop-up stores are doing) why would making a smaller version of your existing store convince consumers to buy product? unless you think your consumers are thtoopid? um…

A cheap imitation of the original experience.

Pop Up Stores: A cheap imitation of the original experience.

thinking of showing my boobs. trying to make my porti unique.

it’s tough being in advertising today. once upon a time, nobody even knew it was a career. nobody believed that you could get paid to think up funny / smart / relevant / enagaging / viral / cool / prestigious / down-to-earth / honest / housewifey / working daddish / [insert name of target market and or their values here] ideas and call it a job.

things have changed. these days everyone is in advertising. everyone is zany. everyone is cool. warhol said everyone would be famous, but he didn’t say everyone was going to be awesome.

Everyone is zany and creative and pushing deadlines and consumer promises.

Everyone is zany and creative and pushing deadlines and consumer promises. It's called Being The Brand. You are the brand. You are the trend. You are the future. You are now. Be with me. Here. With my brand. Now. Together we will collaborate and appeal to more people than we would appeal to if we were apart.

these days  even the beggar who sits outside my gate at home has his own corporate colours for the chalk board he holds up. i know this because i offered him some spare chalk the other day and he only took the blue and the orange chalk because ‘these are my colours’.

struggling to come to terms with what the world is coming to.

been feeling something like this:

new year! / new porti!

so been looking over other peoples’ portfolios to get some inspiration as to how i can differentiate myself from the masses of creatives out there and their personal creative copywriter / art director brands. and then further differentiate myself as a professional who can create brands that i’m not personally involved with.

*****************************************************************

“Talent is no longer about original ideas. Talent is about being able to come up with original ideas that are not based on or created for / by you or your experiences, but look like they were created by the person they were created for.” – Alex van Tonder, in an interview with Bill Bernbacklett

************************************************************

i’m not sure how not to get personally involved with the brands i work on. just like i’m not sure how to not hook up with all the men at my office. wish i’d saved one of them for a rainy day. maybe i can create controversy within the agency by pulling a Lindsay Lohan and kissing a client service chick and then refusing to answer any questions. although when i kissed Jenny that one night at Diaz Tavern no one even asked any questions.

you see what i mean when i say that it’s hard to differentiate yourself these days?

Another agency party at some obscure pub in Gardens Industria. Ive got sooooo many of these pics its almost not even worth uploading it. Ever feel like all truly great ideas have already been done? Paris Hilton did blowjobs and penetration. Lindsay and Britney did their crotch-flashings. Sharon Stone did that leg-cross thing in Basic Instinct. The world is so competitive yulle. Really hard for me to keep ahead of the curve when it comes to showing what makes me special as a copywriter, what makes me different to all the other copywriters out there.

Another agency party at some obscure pub in Gardens Industria. I've got sooooo many of these pics it's almost not even worth uploading it. Ever feel like all truly great ideas have already been done? Paris Hilton did blowjobs and penetration. Lindsay and Britney did their crotch-flashings. Sharon Stone did that leg-cross thing in Basic Instinct. The world is so competitive y'ulle. Really hard for me to keep ahead of the curve when it comes to showing what makes me special as a copywriter, what makes me different to all the other copywriters out there.

NEwayz… back to the porti. should it be digital? should i invent a program that allows you to download my porti in a nanosecond? maybe i can make it so small that you have to view it with nanoglasses on nano chips? will nano still be big in 2010 or am i running with a fad here?

Should I pressurise my own blood and spray out my headlines under water so that Creative Directors see that I understand new media?

Should I pressurise my own blood and spray out my headlines under water so that Creative Directors see that I understand new media?

or should i keep my porti old school? big red leatherbound book with my name embossed in Cooper Bold in White letters? feel like there is a certain amount of gravitas when i whack down a beast of a porti like that on a Creative Director’s desk. although i haven’t actually used it since i graduated way back in 2004. since then, a well-written email that conveys my ability to stay calm in the face of chaos has gotten me every job i’ve ever had.

An example of the well-written, to-the-point letter that got me my job at King James.

An example of the well-written, to-the-point letter that got me my job at King James.

i’ve heard that some legendary creatives don’t even have portfolios, they just email a list of awards annuals and corresponding page numbers when they’re looking for a job. that feels a little wanky to me. i feel like if someone made me wade through crusty awards annuals that gather like dust in the corners of agency toilets, i wouldn’t want to offer them a job. unless it was dusting the awards annuals gathering weevils in the agency toilets.

Does NE one out there still care about awards? If i have a list of awards longer than my hair will you want to hire me? Or would you be more inclined to hire me if i just sent you a link to my blog with pictures of myself taking photos of myself on it? Wish someone had answers for me. Im feeling the photo vibe more. Just coz I know my good side.

Does NE one out there still care about awards? If i have a list of awards longer than my hair will you want to hire me? Or would you be more inclined to hire me if i just sent you a link to my blog with pictures of myself taking photos of myself on it? Wish someone had answers for me. I'm feeling the photo vibe more. Just coz I know my good side.

maybe i should record my porti into an album and take off my clothes to promote it. i’d go around the country doing signings which double up as interviews. being Gen Y, it is all about me interviewing the agency and not the other way round. i’d listen as they tell me how they want to help me ‘grow my craft’ and ‘collaborate and cross pollinate‘ my tech-savvy skills with their experienced eye for Letraset.

Collaboration across the generation gap is key to moving forward in the future.

Collaboration across the generation gap is key to moving forward in the future.

i’m going to make this porti quest my holiday project. gonna come back with some fresh material. gonna come back with a come back.

“I see you. And I just wanna dance with you. LOLOLOLOL.” – Brutney Spears

first idea bounty winner

i wrote about idea bounty a while back. i think i gave it an extravagant write up. best thing since sliced bread etc. well it seems they walk the talk, and have just paid up $2 500 to a planner at BBDO Paris. which makes me feel a little jealous. half of me – the half that’s been exploited for my ideas by market research companies for the past 4 years – didn’t believe they would actually pay up. but now that i see they do, i’m on top of their next brief quicker than you can say “Mow The Lawn!”

also, here’s a super cool interview with the dude who won.

See? Your good ideas can make you rich.

See? Your good ideas can make you rich.

Goldilocks and the Grand Daddy

went to go see Mark and Jo Stead’s caravan the other night. walked into the beautifully redone foyer of the old Metropole hotel (now the Grand Daddy as in Daddy Long Legs Art Hotel) and asked where i could find the caravans.

“You mean the Gulf Streams?” said the receptionist. Aren’t Gulf Streams jets? Turns out they are called “Airstreams”.  NEways, ascended the staircase and landed on the roof of the metropole. Mark and co were sitting around with ciders and wine. The only 2 caravans i saw worth documenting were Mark’s and another artist who did a polkadot dorothy theme. some pics:

Lotsa dotses.

Lotsa dotses.

Dot dot dot.

Dot dot dot.

Theres no place like home.

There's no place like home.

We were joking that it would be funny if the south easter picked up this caravan and dumped it in the middle of Bree Street.

We were joking that it would be funny if the south easter picked up this caravan and dumped it in the middle of Bree Street.

Me in a dot mirror.

Me in a dot mirror.

And onto Mark and Jo’s Gulf Stream Jet:

Momma bears chair. Note the embroidery in the cushion.

Momma bear's chair. Note the embroidery in the cushion.

Wait, this is more like Momma bears chair.

Wait, this is more like Momma bear's chair.

Bear family heritage. A proud mantelpiece.

Bear family heritage. A proud mantelpiece.

A solid bear face. The kind of bear youd like to sit down at a fireside with and talk berries and salmon.

A solid bear face. The kind of bear you'd like to sit down at a fireside with and talk berries and salmon.

Special bear porridge bowls.

Special bear porridge bowls.

Kinky post-its from Goldilocks.

Kinky post-its from Goldilocks.

Goldilocks wig. Her dress hangs up in the cupboard.

Goldilocks wig. Her dress hangs up in the cupboard.

The bear head is also in the cupboard. Things start looking very kinky round about now.

The bear head is also in the cupboard. Things start looking very kinky round about now.

Mark in his bear mask. Far more charming than the Dead Kennedys mask he wore to the christmas party.

Mark in his bear mask. Far more charming than the Dead Kennedy's mask he wore to the christmas party.

And there you have it. If you’d like to stay there, get ready to pay 4 star prices. Book by popping into 38 Long Street or by calling +27 21 424 7247 or by emailing info@granddaddy.co.za .

trying to come up with a Loeries stage gimmick. need to make a lasting impression in the industry’s inebriated minds.

Under all sorts of pressure right now. The agency xmas party is on Friday and I still don’t have what I need for my beehive, or my satin ballet slippers. Irksome. Been thinking a lot of about Loeries next year. You know when that book The Secret came out and everyone started ‘being positive’ and ‘following the laws of attraction’ and writing affirmations about money in the gratitude journals? Was wondering if the law of attraction applies to awards. Should I imagine a lot of Loeries flying towards me like magnets? Or is that a bit unrealistic.

Maybe if I flap my hands it will call The Loeries to me and my life will be like a advertising remake of Hitchcocks The Birds.

Maybe if I flap my hands it will call The Loeries to me and my life will be like a advertising remake of Hitchcock's 'The Birds'.

Been thinking about what kind of crazy zany antic I can do when I go on stage to collect my gold Loerie award. You know how some really crazy creatives like to do hand-stands when they collect their awards? I need some sort of stage gimmick like that. Some creatives get zany by throwing their panties at the mayor of Margate. Others have lollopped up the stage like monkeys. I’m not feeling like any of these antics really reflects my deeply introspective yet also fun and lighthearted creative nature.

Should i take a giant crusty fake hot dog / banana on stage with me and hump it? Such a big decision for me to make.

Should i take a giant crusty fake hot dog / banana on stage with me and hump it? Such a big decision for me to make.

I could take a fire extinguisher up with me and set it off onstage. Setting off fire extinguishers unnecessarily is pretty kooky, hey?

Maybe I could roll up a banner that says something about how immersed in the industry I am, such as ‘Interns are for mounting’ or ‘Life’s a pitch’. Do you think anyone will notice that I took those sayings from the zany stickers Net#work BBDO made last year? Ppl will probably shout ‘that’s been done before’ because they will be pretty bitter about my gold.

I could reinterpret a South African classic and do the Nik Nak man dance on stage to show ppl how I have an appreciation of all things local and retro. Hopefully the camera will zoom in on my Casio Gold Calculator watch that I got from ShelfLife, and really bring retro to life.

Maybe I should reinvent myself as a retro electronics brand? Is that more meaningful than strapping a retro electronics bag to your wrist? Sometimes always pushing for concept is a lot of work.

Maybe I should reinvent myself as a retro electronics brand? Is that more meaningful than strapping a retro electronics brand to your wrist? Sometimes 'always pushing for concept' is a lot of work.

Maybe I should be more subtle, and wear some Coverse High-Tops with a flouncy ballgown (a visual contradiction / irony / the tension of opposites), thereby telling ppl that even tho I win gold Loeries and wear ballgowns and shiz, I am still able to keep it real in my All Stars, while retaining township cred (important for a white girl).

I would have to practise my nonchalant shrug. Need to keep it real in my All Stars.

I would have to practise my nonchalant shrug. Need to keep it real in my All Stars.

It’s all a bit much to think about right now. Maybe y’ulle have some cool gimmick ideas that you can send me, for which I won’t credit you but will use in order to advance my social standing and industry credibility. Mail me.

How to Not Keep It Real in your All Stars. For shame, this bro is a 90s surf brand, not a retro electronics brand.

How to Not Keep It Real in your All Stars. For shame, this bro is a 90s surf brand, not a retro electronics brand.

pop-up retail: sounds rad, looks bad

‘pop-up retail’ is one of those annoying phrases that marketers have been throwing around strat sessions for a good 5 years now, and i see on cherryflava that puma has finally gone and produced their very own pop-up store at the V&A waterfront. while the phrase ‘pop-up retail’ might make 2 bit strategic consultancies feel very innovative and vital to the brands they are trying to enhance, it doesn’t impress me. and while i may be wrong here, i don’t think it impresses the consumer, either.

like husky dogs, pop-up retail is a first-world import that doesn’t sit well here. sure, in a country like sweden, which has all but obliterated the bottom half of maslow’s heirarchy of needs, putting an expensive brand in a prefab shack does come off as novel. zany. funky. but in this country, which might as well be renamed ‘Shack City’ over South Africa, a prefab container just doesn’t come off as impressive. does this make you want to walk inside and spend a lot of money on tracksuits and shoes?

Wow! Glass doors! Corrugated steel walls that look like shit! Man i cant wait to shop here.

Wow! Glass doors! Corrugated steel walls that look like shit!

i also wonder why they put a pop-up store at a location that already has a real store. a real store in a real building. maybe it’s because no one goes to the new fashion wing at the waterfront? or maybe it’s because the cool coloured kids who work behind the counter in the real store are holding it hostage by refusing to turn the bad music down? maybe it’s because young hip consumers see a brand that has only one store as being ‘poor’ and therefore non-aspirational? sigh. Gen Y are so complicated, so demanding. i don’t even understand myself some times. let’s look some more at the crappy store:

Hey, isnt this enticing? My eye is drawn to the hazard tape at the top. This place looks cooking and dangerous. Wish all my lifestyle brands could look like this.

Gonna cut myself on the metal so i can feel one with the store.

yeeeeeah. remember kids, just because Puma jumps off a building, doesn’t mean you have to, too.

get paid for your ideas. no, really.

there are a lot of dodgy companies around that ask ‘consumers’ to come up with ways for companies to improve their products / services. usually these companies take these ideas and present them as their own and then give you 150 bucks and a few slices of pizza for your time. not ideabounty, which allows you to submit ideas in a closed system, and if your idea is used you get paid $2 500 (yes, that is a dollar sign). i’ve signed up. i’ll be answering my first brief once i’ve finished the golfing headlines i have to write.

there’s no ‘i’ in team; there’s no internet connection at a rugby stadium

on friday we all got chased out of the studio and told to meet at a door on the side of the Newlands Rugby Stadium. for those of you who abhorr rugby as much as myself, this was a bit like being told to meet at the Red Door in Woodstock. not that i know what the Red Door is. maybe it was Yellow Door?

above the rules.

Mallix: above the rules.

anyway, we were taken into the bowels of Newlands, and treated to a career peptalk that went something like, Work Harder, Win More Awards, Make Ideas That People Notice, Win More Awards. which got us all really inspired, so we ran out onto the field and practised our ambition lunges:

Ambition lunges are a very if not THE most important part of your workout, so be sure to factor them into your training schedule.

Ambition lunges are a very if not THE most important part of your workout, so be sure to factor them into your training schedule.

fair enough. What i enjoyed most was being exposed to what the JDR Creative Directors believe to be legendary work. all too often you get used to work getting bombed or approved, but you don’t really know what appeals to the people approving your work. Jo showed us a lot of fashion-related ideas. Ross showed us some of the old Musica work, which was simple but great. And Livio showed us this really long video about Ferrari… (No he di’nt!) Yes, he did.

Random picture of rugby stadium so you can pretend you were there.

Random picture of rugby stadium so you can pretend you were there.

once we’d been inspired, we were all tasked with brainstorming a billboard for Hyundai, along the lines of 2010 if we felt so inclined. watching a bunch of indoorsy creative types pitter-pattering-cigarette-puffering around an empty rugby stadium did bring the LOLs a bit. then, we all painted our ideas up on a giant canvas that was set up inside.

Pushed to our limits by the introduction of unconventional scamping media.

Pushed to our limits by the introduction of unconventional scamping media.

Our staid ways of conveying ideas are obliterated as we adjust to this new way of communicating with those judging our work.

Our staid ways of conveying ideas are obliterated as we adjust to this new way of communicating with those judging our work.

Jarred gets fully into it while everyone else gets into the butternut samoosas.

Jarred gets fully into it while everyone else gets into the butternut samoosas.

Good times, good times.