Tag Archives: obama

obama got the job and i’ve got a vision. let’s dance!

hey i know we advertising ppl live in a world of our own but did any of y’ulle hear?barack obama applied for the job of Prez of the United States of America and he got the job. pretty cool, huh?

gives me hope about my own dreams of becoming the President of the United States of America. LOL you can all probably guess that’s not reaaally my dream. like the parents of some rich hot chick in some movie said, Why would i want to waste my looks by using my brain?

This is a picture of me studying for my final exam back in college. Think it was Writing Eye Catching Billboards.

This is a picture of me studying for my final exam back in college. Think it was 'Writing Eye Catching Billboards".

Don’t worry y’ulle. There’s no danger of me using my brain any time soon. I’m very happy doing ppls nails (metaphorically speaking). I know that ppl value what i do and that i am useful and provide a service to someone, somewhere, and that’s all that matters, right?

Well…I’m not so sure anymore. You know as long as things are going badly (Southafricanland’s future president is a criminal & there’s a recession) i feel pretty okay with my lot because i can compare it too how bad things must be for other people (like any one of Jacob Zuma’s possibly HIV infected 9 wives or anyone who’s been retrenched due to the recession). But now that things have gone so well for Obama i kinda want to know when i can achieve my dream of being a respected copywriter-pop artist with my hit single ‘I Wanna Be Ur Facebook Girlfriend’ and the video in which i am naked except for *Sparkles* the editors have put on my hoo-hoo in post-production, while i dance against a slippery wall in the LA desert.

I have been called competitive, but really i am just resentful when people are more successful than me. - Alex van Tondress, S. African Advertising Pop Star

"I have been called 'competitive', but really i am just resentful when people are more successful than me." - Alex van Tondress, S. African Advertising Pop Star

Other tracks i have possibly lined up for my album include “Deep Etched Sex”, “Word Of My Mouth”, “Let’s Get Tactical”, “Sex Sells” and “Buy Me More”. let’s not forget my special track in honour of Obama called “Wham Bam Thank You M’am”. of course, i would release them for free on myspacebookster first, along with stills from the *Sparkles* scene, and get at least 1 alcohol or sneaker sponsor before i even started speaking to labels, so i know that i still have a lot of work ahead of me. luckily i am very pretty so it goes without saying that i work hard and am determined.

do y’ulle feel similarly affected by Obama’s success? are you jealous / resentful / envious / angry / horny? does Obama’s success make you want to consume brands that position themselves as successful in any way? like does it make you want to trade in your Mac for a Dell? or maybe you want to play PS3 instead of Wii now to honour the fact that the President of the USA is black and no longer white? does Obama’s success make you want to smoke expensive cigars and drink expensive whisky while you talk about expensive brandy in your expensive ‘businessman’s hotel’ on your expensive trip to Japan? I’m just trying to get a feel for what kind of ‘knock-on effect’ or ‘paradigm shift’ will come about as a result of this new president meme.

Obama has a lot of hard work ahead of him. he’s probably stressing, and obviously the Oval Office will now be working double time figuring out endorsement deals and what kind of brands will be appropriate as sponsors for their new pres. he’s probably feeling a bit confused as to which offers he should accept and which he should decline and ‘bank for later’. it will be a very difficult role. i would have a very tough time deciding between wearing Armani or Hugo Boss (and that’s just suits, we haven’t even touched on fragrance yet). Louis Vuitton is probably a bit tacky for luggage for a pres – i would advice him to go Gucci, maybe Prada. just thinking about the kinds of tough brand decisions Obama will have to make kinda gets me dizzy and wondering whether i’d really be able to cope with the pressures of fame.

i mean, an entire generation of men and their girlfriends are relying on him to save them from the grave fashion errors Bush is known for making. i salute you, Obama. you are a brave man to take on these challenges. but you have looked very well groomed and hot thus far, so i have a lot of faith that you will surround yourself with the hottest stylists and some honest fashion advisors and it will all be okay.

analysing Obama’s success like this has totally given me insight into how i can achieve my own success. see here i was giving myself ‘specialist online skills’ and ‘building my niche appeal through experience with social media’ to differentiate myself from all the other copywriter-pop stars out there, but all i really need is a good stylist and a wax therapist that i can trust. my eyes have been opened. i’m gonna change my facebook status right away. i now have concrete goals and a vision. i’m gonna start right now by getting a belly ring. yes i can, y’ulle!

The face of determination. I can haz it, yulle.

The face of determination. I can haz it, y'ulle.


busy. like a person that has too much to do and no laptop to take it all home and do it on.

Ever feel like your To do list is laughing at you?

Ever feel like your 'To do list' is laughing at you?

still adjusting to the madness that is the beginning of the year.

what’s on my plate that’s stopping me from filling your RSS feeds with ramblings about brands, mostly my personal one? many things. i’ll write you a list:

1. Finding a new home. Flat-hunting in Cape Town is nothing short of a soul-destroying experience. I do believe i have found a haven of a nest though, and i’ll speak more about it once i’ve signed the lease.

2. Work. Believe it or not, i don’t only swan around picking up my bags of free stuff all day. Some of the people who give me free stuff expect me to work for them. And some of the people who don’t give me free stuff expect me to work for them, too. I am not yet my own economy. Not just yet.

3. Grooming the Llama out back. This takes up a lot of time. Llamas like their fur, they don’t like to be brushed, dampened or sheared. But duties are duties, I guess.

They know whats coming.

They know what's coming.

4. Looking for a new camera. My old camera was delightful little Ixus. Now, there are so many Ixuses (Ixii?) to choose from that I’m feeling a little stumped. Canon, I have been your loyal customer for years now. You want to send me a sample of your wares? My life is a testament to your products. Just keep reading. You’ll see.

5. Spending all my gift vouchers. This Christmas, I got R200 000 worth of gift vouchers for an assortment of stores / brands / spas / restaurants. As you can imagine, it’s taken a bit of time to work my way through them all. So far my bounty includes: 6 handbags (Prada, Guess – crass i know, but it’s one of their less crass ones and hey, it ain’t my money – , 9 West, Mr Price temps, a Big Blue special), 3 pairs of jeans (Paige, Seven, Diesel-Adidas colabs), 3 x perfumes (Michael Kors, D&G, Prada), 1 x LV Speedy (why not?), a LOT of books, 2 x day treatments at the Westin / Sheraton hotels, 3 x sunglasses (Spitfire still the only shapes i like apart from the big square Diors i found), iPhone, iPod (shuffle, for running), running shoes (New Balance babies)… and that’s it so far. think i have just over R150k left to spend. How ever will i do it? Maybe over 2 years? Buying stuff just gets boring after a while. Plus it adds to the clutter. Truly bad.


So now you know. in other news…

Check out the latest Elle Decoration Revamp 2009 issue for the article on the Grand Daddy Air Stream Mobile hotels. In the one about Mark Stead’s 3 Bears Caravan, you’ll see pics of some bear letters and writings that i did. Some very warped bear letters and writings. Ah, good times.

Until tomorrow, my branded friends, i say goodnight.

new world order etc.

i almost left the office now and went home without blogging about barack obama getting elected president. and then i thought about how my kids would feel (if i ever decide to download some kids) when they ask me one day:

“Mommy where were you when B.O. was elected president? Mommy, what’s it like to have a human president? Mommy, what’s it like to have a president who doesn’t wear sponsored clothing? Mommy, what was the official sponsor of the Electionz Oh-Eight? Mommy, will you gift me a facebook cookie pleeeeeeeze?”

And my answer would go something like:

“I was in Chicago, standing in the crowd, feeling the pulse of the anticipation, palpable, real, filled with hope that light may come to this great country at last,” which is totally true since the HDTVs in the change rooms at gym are pretty much like being there for real, only i was able to stand naked, skin glowing from a 20 minute stint in the sauna, appreciating my personal space.

LOVE you barack. wish we were pals b4 you got all famous for being pres.

LOVE you barack. wish we were pals b4 you got all famous for being pres.

like many other people around the world, i am happy, grateful, bleeding from relief that McCain got the indifference he deserved (dude, Palin. WTF?) I feel like a miracle has happened, but i am also selfish and have a short attention span for good things that happen to other people, and i want to know where the southafricanland version of barack is. do we know any kenyans? or do we know anyone who went to harvard? srsly even if its your cousin, you should put him forward to the ANC or the Shikota party (ANC’s new rival) or we can just start small and put his face up around the Spar on Derry. Not fussed, just want to find a good candidate, and give him/her exposure.

YES WE CAN. Except not this chick because she might give the wrong message to teens and men who like teens (paeds).

YES WE CAN. Except not this chick because she might give the wrong message to teens and men who like teens (paeds).

if i drank (still can’t decide on my brand of choice, life’s hard yo) i would raise a toast to my new home (unless they find an Obama for southafricanland). LOVE being part of the brain drain. makes me feel like an elf fleeing to wherever the elves fled to at the end of Lord of the Rings. taking my magic and giving it to Obama, and he didn’t even ask. might go to Royale tonight and get a milkshake to mark this whole special occasion. happy new world order everyone. still super busy adjusting and recovering from vida e caffe scuffle injuries but promise will be back to blogging full speed soon. with my left hand, upside down.

now YOU can vote in the American elections. kind of.

it won’t count, officially, but everyone will know the truth about whether the world is supporting obama or sexy sarah. you might as well have an opinion, since whatever America does ends up affecting you. even if YOU are an inuit counting your furs.

Someone make one for South Africa? Mothman vs Zoom-zoom-zoom?

Someone make one for South Africa? Mothman vs Zoom-zoom-zoom?