Monthly Archives: September 2008

immaculate threads by dominic wilcox

What Steve Jobs cupboard looks like.

What Steve Jobs' cupboard looks like.

Love this spread in Esquire’s 75th Anniversary edition. via NotCot. more of dominic’s work here.

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existential crisis: should i send myself the Asp application?

I dont want to live on your friendslist anymore. Life has no meaning.

I don't want to live on your friendslist anymore. Life has no meaning.

so i’ve been thinking a lot about committing facebook suicide. i mean, it used to be fun, but now that i’ve been clean for so long it just feels a bit irrelevant to my life.it wasn’t always this way. i was once a junkie too, online pretty much all day, commenting on walls, sending people growing gifts. i never stooped so low as to send the What is your Stripper Name app, and i am proud to say that i was never desperate enough to add the Zombie vs Werewolves app, but i was right in there. i was poking back.

One of the worlds most devastating wars. Ever. We are still slightly crippled from the damage it caused to the world economy.

One of the world's most devastating wars. Ever. There are some who say the Poke War of 2007 is what's responsible for the present crash of the world's economy.

then, i changed jobs, and my new employer blocked facebook all day except for an hour at lunch. and not even the withdrawal pangs could keep me at my desk at lunch just to check facebook. turns out it was for the best, because once i’d had a long enough break i realised just what a shadow of myself i’d become (ok quite a pretty, airbrushed, pouting shadow, but still a shadow), slave to this glorified message board.

Look how hot I am.

Look how hot I am.

Me in Real Life Book.

Me in Real Life Book.


the thing is, so many of my friends are still hooked and very much caught up in its web. and, like some of my smoker friends who know that I’ve quit, they continue to offer me cigarettes in the form of L’il Green Patch application invites, to which i am always tempted to respond:

Dont send me apps. Srsly. If I wanted it Id already have it.

Don't send me apps. Srsly. If I wanted it I'd already have it.

The only reason I can see to keep my account open is to provide people with a place they can go to find my email address and my web addresses. maybe i should delete everything except my most basic information. but even that seems like too much effort.to me, facebook is one of those 2007 fads. the online equivalent of the palestinian scarf or the shutter shades.
I just dont want to be in a committed scarf relationship right now. But you will always be in my heart.

I just don't want to be in a committed scarf relationship right now. But you will always be in my heart.

An ancient relic. Yes people used to actually wear these. You can find fossils in Margate from the Loerie Awards back in 2008.

An ancient relic. Yes people used to actually wear these. You can find fossils in Margate from the Loerie Awards back in 2008.

i am still in a quandary about what the right thing to do is. i am worried that if i commit facebook suicide my facebook life insurance won’t pay out and i will go to facebook hell. or does facebook send its unhappy souls to facebook heaven? what is facebook heaven? is it filled with pokes and pouts? hopefully no one reading this knows the answer to that question.

need an objective opinion?

Sidetaker allows you to present your high contentious issue while complete strangers give you their opinion on what the right course of action is. great idea, except people would be biased in how they tell their stories. i’ll give it a go and see how it works out.

oh my flipping gosh: WANT

my little predator pony. **falls face first into keyboard**

Made by artist Mari Kasurenin

Made by artist Mari Kasurenin

getting in touch with my inner predator part 2: suggestions for branded christmas giveaways

not all squid are predators but when i think about squids i always think about the giant ones. therefore all squids are predators in my mind. anyway christmas is coming – bet the shops already told you – so i’ll be starting a list of ‘gift hints’ on mybrandedlife which will both have some sort of branding context and will also serve as handy reference for when you are shopping for me. if you are shopping for me. if you care. i’m adding this squid hat to my list:

Dignified. Works with skinny jeans and peep toes. Maybe a bright summar pinafore. Gives me Amy Winehouse cool with the fear of what her hair smells like.

Dignified. Works with skinny jeans and peep toes. Maybe a bright summer pinafore. Gives me Amy Winehouse cool with the fear of what her hair smells like.

also this shark hat will do really nicely:

A retro tilt will give my usually tomboy-ish style of dressing a dash of retro dandy glam. Or so my fashion school friends tell me.

A retro tilt will give my usually tomboy-ish style of dressing a dash of retro dandy glam. Or so my fashion school friends tell me.

Brands are always on the lookout for items they can put their logo on and give out at club promotions / product festivals / general giveaways. I would love to receive either of these as a branded giveaway, and I know I am not alone. Compare another branded key ring / lanyard / peak cap / t-shirt to a squid / shark hat. Logos I can imagine appearing on these fashion feats are:

–  Heineken

Savanna

–  Mini Cooper (imagine getting a squid hat free with your car purchase? I could die happy)

– Woolworths under Woolworths Sea Predators Original Label (it doesn’t exist but i am making suggestions here)

– The Young Designers Emporium Hats Originalz Line (also To Be Seen in the Future)

What if the World

Something Fishy should have loads of these in their restaurant franchises, and whenever you order the Calamari and Fries you get the Squid Hat. If you order the combo dish you get the Shark Hat because it makes you the ultimate predator.

I could be here all afternoon…

how to write a recruitment ad

A rousing finale with Mr Stabby. From Murder Burger in New Zealand.

A rousing finale with Mr Stabby. From Murder Burger in New Zealand.

connecting with my inner predator via a cake

For your Jaws. To. Masticate. Nom Nom Nom.

For your Jaws. To. Masticate. Nom Nom Nom.

i’ve always maintained that if i were a shark in captivity, i would fling myself against the glass of my tank until it cracked, or die trying. i would be vicious and predatorial, and i would eat anything they put in the tank with me. i feel that this cake captures some of that primeval desire to connect with the .02% of my genes that was once a prehistoric shark in the first waters before we all became land mammals.