Tag Archives: CRM

Conversation with a CRM manager

Phone rings. I answer.


CRM dude:     Hello, is that Mr van Tonder?


Me:                  No it’s not Mr van Tonder.


CRM dude:    Um, is that Queen van Tonder?


Me:                  Uh…sure. Let’s go with ‘Queen’ (flashbacks to a very varied Title drop-down menu…).


CRM dude:     Okay, Queen van Tonder, I’m calling from [Premium Alcohol Brand],   and I’d just like to confirm your details are still the same.


Me:                  Sure. How can I help you?


CRM dude:     Is your address still ‘Castle Greyskull, Wembley Square’?


Me:         Uh… (thinks back to that one evening years ago when I was asked to ‘fill in your details if you would like to experience further     communication from Premium Alcohol Brand’) No. It’s Castle Greyskull, 3rd Floor North Block, Wembley Square.


CRM dude:    Thanks. Enjoy the rest of your day!



some sage Ad-vice

shamelessly lifted from the wk guys (has apparently been around for ages):

When the client moans and sighs
Make his logo twice the size
If the client still proves refractory
Show a picture of the factory
Only in the gravest cases
Should you show the clients’ faces

and then i really quite liked their additional verses:

If the ads have gone to pot
Mention blogging quite a lot

If you want to dazzle them
Drop in terms like CRM

To make your clients think you’re sage
Give campaigns a myspace page

To make them think you’re clever chaps
Make references to Google Maps

If accused of strategic shirking
Bang on about social networking

If they still think the work is crap
You must present an iPhone app

**************************************************************

Sound familiar?

**silence**

I thought so.

***Lets take this brand into the future!***

***Let's take this brand into the future!***