Hey yulz. Been feeling down lately. Been worried that I am ‘stuck in the 90s’. The other day was driving and saw a Calvin Klein orgy billboard and it ‘appealed to my sensibilities’ and ‘spoke to my aspirations of being a liberal individual who is also hot’, which planted the seed of worry.
Then I walked past Ed Hardy at the waterfront and actually considered ‘paying money to look like some trashy slut’ who digs rhinestones and skulls and tattoo-vibes, which is when the warning bells really kicked in.
A picture of class.
Then, as I was perusing this season’s handbags, I almost dropped 1k on a piece of shit Guess handbag, because I momentarily forgot the rules.
How to smell 'rich'.
Then I experienced an urge to ‘push social boundaries’ by being free-spirited and zany and ‘experimenting with social taboos’ by sleeping with all my friends (guys and girls). Was a low point. Might as well drench myself in CK1 and put Nevermind on repeat.
Anyone got a vial of blood I can wear round my neck? Is 4 my image.
Then sat at home and felt crap about myself, and decided that I need bigger boobs, which sent me spiralling, because if anything is soooo last decade, it’s big boobs. Mother of god.
Big Boobs. Not renowned for dating well.
And then came the last straw: I was catching up on the mandatory morning reading and saw that Britney had died her hair dark again, and I wondered if I should exclaim loudly about how much I hate her. Maybe subject a few innocent colleagues to my opinions about ‘how dumb Britney is’. Which was when I realised it: I am stuck in the 90s.
Britney-hating: the ultimate 90s opinion.
Feel very down. Can’t believe I thought I was a child of the new millennium. Thought I was original and intellectual and free-spirited and one-of-a-kind and ‘unique’. Thought that people ‘see something different and special’ in me because I go against the social grain and ‘cannot be controlled’. But now I realised I’m just a retard loser stuck in the 90s. FML.
Posted in accessible premium, advertising, celebrity, personal branding, purchase process, retail, seen around town
Tagged am i, being liberal, big boobs, calvin klein, dated, ed hardy, guess, my branded life, orgy billboard, personal branding, sleeping with your friends, south african, stereotypes, stuck in the 90s, trashy brands
sheesh. just saw Christopher Doyle Identity Guidelines and realised i’ve got to step up my game (it’s a PDF – will start downloading but is worth it i promise).
Hey y’ulle. Been thinking and have decided am not going to nomin8 myself in the SA Blog Eagle Lion Pencil Prix Awards this year. Just feel like before we know it, we’ll all be blogging for awards and writing ‘scam posts’ just so we can get little buttons for the side of the page. Feel like I want to stay true to what my blog is really about: posting pix of myself where I look really hot, then writing about how ugly I feel, so lots of ppl email me and tell me that I’m rly hot. Kidding. Feel like I want to stay true to living my brand and searching for my consumer promise. Not really sure winning awards etc etc will do much for my positioning as ‘the blog for the marketing savvy marketer’ / ‘The number 1 creative BLOG in South Africa’. Feel like I’ll be feeding myself my own words on a hat to cut off my foot and shoot myself in the face.
“The truth isn’t the truth until people believe you / and they can’t believe you if they don’t know what you’re saying / and they can’t know what you’re saying if they don’t listen to you / and they won’t listen to you if you’re not interesting / and you won’t be interesting unless you say things imaginatively / originally / freshly.” – Bill Bernbach, the Dis Be Advertising Album, 1965
The 'Dis B Advertising' Album Artwork, 1965 (re-release 1985)
Not rly going for this ‘winner!’ vibe or this ‘top blogger in the world of cape town / twitter’ vibe. Feel like making this whole thing competitive takes the fun out of it. So just wanted to tell y’ulle NOT to vote for me here. If you don’t vote for me here, then y’ulle will all be the winners. Together, we will be simply sharing our experiences in advertising to ultimately deliver a better product.
My Homie: Bill BB
“Our job is to sell our clients’ merchandise… not ourselves / Our job is to kill the cleverness that makes us shine instead of the product / Our job is to simplify / to tear away the unrelated / to pluck out the weeds that are smothering the product message.” Bill Bernbach, the Pop Yo Logo On Dis Bitch album, 1973
Am having a good feeling about this. Feeling focused, like I know who I am again. Still need a Loeries gimmick though. Should I dress up like Bill Bernbach? Will Bill Bernbach be recognisable as a costume when they interview me on Top Billing about my Grand Loerie Eagle Pencil Prix Award? Will pics of me dressed like Bill Bernbach get me more hits on my blog?
Love ya Bill.
Being a copywriter is something complex y’ulle. Sometimes wish I’d studied Business Science and worked at Goldman Sachs with my ugly English boyfriend/bloke in London, getting wasted in pubs, ‘singing the song thinking this is the life”.
Posted in advertising, online, South African Blog Awards, The Loerie Awards
Tagged advertising blog, advertising greats, awards shows, being a copywriter, bill bernbach, consumer promise, farce, loerie awards, marketing blog, my branded life, personal branding, SA blog awards, scam, south african blogger awards, voting open